I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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