I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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