Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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