The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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