I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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