Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
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