i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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