I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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