And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize