i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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