so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
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I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
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That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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