just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
We need to get me chipped asap
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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