I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize