apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize