I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize