guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not ubering you a puppy
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize