so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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