SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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