I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize