I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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