you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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