im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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