Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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