hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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