i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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