Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
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There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
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I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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