And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize