it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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