U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize