that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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