Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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