I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize