i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize