I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize