Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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