He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
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