Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
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Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
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Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
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