That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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