dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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