I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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