go do what you do best...puke behind churches
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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