All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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