Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize