woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
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oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
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You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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