wanna go halves on a baby?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize