Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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