if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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