I wish I could punch you in the face.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I fill condoms, not promises.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize