last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
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