It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize